Carton & Rosoff PC-Attorney at Law

Resolving disputes creatively

Couples may be able to better resolve their divorce than a judge

When people in New York are married, they often times make compromises in order to make the marriage work. Many times they may not be happy to do so, but ultimately they do it. When a couple is going through a divorce they may no longer have any incentive to compromise or reach agreements with their spouse. However, if they do not reach agreements, the alternative is that a judge will make the decisions for them. Some divorces do end with a trial, but many couples want to avoid litigation if possible.

That is why divorce mediation can be an effective tool for these couples. Mediation is a process where the couple utilizes a third-party neutral mediator to assist them in negotiations. This can be very helpful especially for couples who start off far apart from each other in terms of what they want. Mediation can be even more effective though if the parties understand what they are getting into prior to showing up for mediation.

So, in order to prepare for a mediation there is some information that the parties should know. One is that the parties are ultimately in control over whether they settle the divorce during the mediation. Also, it will be a stressful time, but each party needs to seriously look at all offers and consider them. It is not useful to dismiss them immediately because they may upset the person.

People need to know that they are the ones who know their relationship and lives the best. If judges make decisions for them, they will be doing so with less than perfect knowledge of their situation. So, even if an offer is not the perfect offer for one party, it may still be better than what a judge would order later. It is also important to understand that mediation can take a day or two to complete and people need to clear their schedules to be able to have meaningful discussions.

There are many people who get divorced in New York. Each outcome will be unique to that couple's situation. That is why utilizing mediation to be able to control the outcome of a divorce can be beneficial to the couple. Experienced attorneys understand not only the law, but also the mediation process and may be able to guide one through it.

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