Carton & Rosoff PC-Attorney at Law

Resolving disputes creatively

Is mediation the right solution for your divorce?

Mediation is often an attractive decision for couples who are still on fairly amicable terms. During mediation, both parties will meet with an attorney who is there to help them reach an agreement. In this process, the attorney remains completely neutral and does not advise either party. The idea behind mediation is that each side will work together to come up with a solution. This way, you can avoid unnecessary conflicts, legal fees and stress on your family. However, mediation may not always be the best decision for every situation. 

Pros of mediation:

  • It is an amicable way to go about the divorce process, working directly with your spouse to come up with a solution.
  • If the process goes smoothly, mediation can save both parties a lot of money in legal fees.
  • Keep the decision strictly between you and your ex-spouse. A judge won't determine what will happen to your assets and your children.
  • Easier process for the children.

Cons of mediation:

  • If mediation does not go smoothly, you will have to start the process from scratch, which means potentially lost money.
  • Because all financial assets are disclosed voluntarily, mediation leaves room for a spouse to potentially hide assets.
  • May lead to unfair deals, especially if one spouse tends to dominate the other.

When mediation works well

Mediated divorces work well if both partners are relatively amicable when approaching divorce and believe that they will be able to work out disputes fairly between themselves. However, mediation can be problematic even when a relationship is fairly amicable.

Because there is no individual legal counsel during mediation, individuals in relationships with uneven power dynamics, may want to consider other options. Instances where one spouse controls the finances of the family, or tends to be more dominant than the other, may lead to undesirable outcomes for the other spouse.

Other alternative divorce solutions

Just because mediation may not be right for your situation does not mean you have to be adversarial when approaching your divorce. You may still want to work together but feel that it is best to have your own legal counsel. If this is the case, you may consider a collaborative divorce; which still has compromise and negotiation as the goal but allows for each party to have their own attorney advising them.

When deciding how you want to handle your divorce, it's important to remember that every relationship and situation is different. What worked for someone else may not be the right decision for you. No one knows the dynamics of your relationship better than yourself, so take control of the matter and decide for yourself how to best approach the divorce process.

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Carton & Rosoff PC
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White Plains, NY 10601

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